Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Happy New Year!


We will soon leave 2011 behind us forever. And we joyfully welcome 2012 as we believe for a great New Year!

Every year we leave the old behind and welcome the new. Every year we have good memories that will continue to bless us for years to come, and we also have some bad ones from which we can learn and grow.

Just as each new day offers us a fresh new start and opportunity, we have a new year to anticipate and expect many good things. Regardless of any disappointments or challenges faced in 2011, let us continue to hope, dream, and set new goals for 2012. It is going to be good. Expect it and plan on it!

The Old Year has gone. Let the dead past bury its own dead. The New Year has taken possession of the clock of time. All hail the duties and possibilities of the coming twelve months!
~Edward Payson Powell

We will open the book. Its pages are blank. We are going to put words on them ourselves. The book is called Opportunity and its first chapter is New Year's Day.
~Edith Lovejoy Pierce



May you have a very Happy, Healthy, Prosperous and Blessed New Year!!

God bless you, Krystal, Violet and all of us at New Day Counseling

NewDayCounseling.org


Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Christmas Joy: The Story of a Modern Day Santa

There are three stages of man: he believes in Santa Claus; he does not believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus. ~Bob Phillips

The holiday season can be one of the most beautiful and loving times of the year. It is a magical time when our hearts are more open to give and think of others. Whether it is gifts, donations, or kindness, our giving brings us much of the joy we experience and associate with Christmas.

A man recently told me of an unexpected encounter he had with a homeless couple. He was on his way to work and planned to make a quick stop at a hardware store. As he walked in he saw a young man and woman carrying what appeared to be all their belongings in bags. He made brief contact with the couple at the store entrance and learned that they were on their way to the local homeless shelter. They were with a large group and had missed their ride when they made a stop. On his way into the store, the couple asked the man for a ride to the shelter. When he told them he was unable to give them a ride, they asked him for a some money for the next bus. They were desperate. The man gave them a few dollars and wished them well. He proceeding to complete his errand, but couldn't get the sad image of the homeless couple out of his mind.  He had a strong desire to turn back to do more for them. He believed the couple was being truthful with him. He didn’t know how they got into the situation they were in, but his heart went out to them. He turned around and saw them walking toward the bus stop.  He approached them and with a warm, loving smile, put a large dollar bill into the young man’s hand. In complete surprise and gratitude, the young man began to weep and hugged the man who helped them. To this homeless couple, he was like Santa Claus; yet, he was an unexpected stranger who crossed their path and shared God’s love with them. That day, this modern-day Santa Claus brought some hope into those people’s lives and much joy into his own. Modern day Santas are some of the jolliest people around!

There is something magical about giving. It blesses everyone involved. Christmastime is one very special time, and one of many that we have to spread the good cheer and make someone’s day, week, month, or life brighter. Don’t wait until a special occasion to bring joy to others. Now is the time to give, love and experience some Christmas magic!

Somehow, not only for Christmas,
But all the long year through,
The joy that you give to others,
Is the joy that comes back to you.
And the more you spend in blessing,
The poor and lonely and sad,
The more of your heart's possessing,
Returns to you glad.
~John Greenleaf Whittier

The joy of brightening other lives, bearing each others' burdens, easing other's loads and supplanting empty hearts and lives with generous gifts becomes for us the magic of Christmas. ~ W. C. Jones
 
Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful. ~Norman Vincent Peale

Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love. ~Hamilton Wright Mabi


Copyright © 2010 Krystal Kuehn andViolet James, BeHappy4Life.com,   All Rights Reserved.


Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a licensed professional counselor, author, teacher, and musician. She specializes in helping people live their best life now, reach their full potential, overcome barriers, heal from their past, and develop a lifestyle of health, happiness, and love. Krystal is the cofounder of NewDayCounseling.org, a relationship counseling, family counseling center, specializing in helping individuals, couples and families with professional counseling services for relationship problems, parenting issues, depression, anxiety as well a s substance abuse classes, anger management groups, and more. Krystal is also cofounder of StopSuicideSong.com and BeHappy4Life.com as well as Facebook.com/WordsOfInspiration and several blogs.


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Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Do You See The Clouds or Sunshine? It's Your Choice

"What a beautiful, sunny day,” I thought when I awoke this morning. “It’s going to be a good day!” I got out of bed with a new energy and a good attitude. Then I began to wonder, what is it about today that’s different from the past several days? Well, it was cloudy most every other morning until this morning. What a difference sunshine can make! Actually, as I pondered this, I came to realize that it is so much more than that. What it really comes down to is a choice. Notice that I had determined in my mind that it was going to be a good day. Every day and every hour, it is up to us to decide how we’re going to respond to situations, people, problems and plans.

External factors can have the power to influence us, lead us to feel pressured, or respond out of habit only in accordance to how much we allow them to. And that’s just it. How much will we allow them to? We have a free will. That leaves us with a responsibility to choose the good, true, just, and lovely if we want to enjoy our lives. Even the desire to break out of old, negative patterns requires us to make a choice. Ultimately, we are in control of our choices and attitudes.

Another key point that determined the good attitude I had for the day was the expression of my heartfelt gratitude as I enjoyed the beauty of the brightness from the sun. A heart of gratitude always improves our attitude. A grateful heart keeps our focus on the good in people, the possibilities, and the simple enjoyment and refreshing that can come from the things we so often take for granted.

Regardless of the weather or any other external factors, keeping our focus right will help us maintain a healthy attitude of hope and expectation of good things to come. The warmth of the sun, the brightness of its light, the shimmer of its beauty never changes. Clouds can block it but can’t take it away.

The next time the clouds threaten to take your sunshine away, remember that it is shining just as bright as ever. You don’t have to wait for the clouds to lift to experience its warmth or to appreciate its beauty. Let it remind you that God’s mercies are new every morning. He doesn’t change like the weather or people or situations do. He is always there to brighten up even your darkest day. His light will help you to see that there is hope no matter what the situation. The warmth of His love will wrap around you and keep you safe in His care. You can rejoice and be glad for this is the day the Lord has made and He wants you to enjoy it!

Copyright 2006 Krystal Kuehn
Do You See The Clouds or Sunshine? It's Your Choice
Mirror Newspaper, Dec. 15, 2005, Vol. 2, Number 15
by Krystal Kuehn



Welcome every morning with a smile. Look on the new day as another special gift from your Creator, another golden opportunity to complete what you were unable to finish yesterday. Be a self-starter. Let your first hour set the theme of success and positive action that is certain to echo through your entire day. Today will never happen again. Don't waste it with a false start or no start at all. You were not born to fail. ~Og Mandino

With the new day comes new strength and new thoughts.  ~Eleanor Roosevelt

This is the beginning of a new day. You have been given this day to use as you will. You can waste it or use it for good. What you do today is important because you are exchanging a day of your life for it. When tomorrow comes, this day will be gone forever; in its place is something that you have left behind... let it be something good. ~Author Unknown
Light is sweet; how pleasant to see a new day dawning. ~Ecclesiastes



Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a licensed professional counselor, author, teacher, and musician. She specializes in helping people live their best life now, reach their full potential, overcome barriers, heal from their past, and develop a lifestyle of health, happiness, and love. Krystal is the cofounder of NewDayCounseling.org, a relationship counseling, family counseling center, specializing in helping individuals, couples and families with professional counseling services for relationship problems, parenting issues, depression, anxiety as well a s substance abuse DUI classes, anger management groups, and more. Krystal is also cofounder of StopSuicideSong.com, BeHappy4Life.com , NewSongProductions.com as well as Facebook.com/WordsOfInspiration and several blogs.

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Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Practice Mindfulness, Acceptance, and Gratitude

 Practice Mindfulness, Acceptance, and Gratitude by Dennis Liegghio (excerpt from Building a Foundation for Happiness )

Acceptance

A great deal of my anger, disappointment, frustration and despair came from unmet expectations… expectations that I was holding onto of myself, of others and of life. I spent many years wasting my energy wishing that people, and life in general was different. Unrealistic and unmet expectations are counterproductive to finding peace and balance and happiness. I was constantly miserable, ungrateful and dissatisfied.

Change is necessary, constant and unavoidable. Nothing stays the same. What is “fair” or “just” or “right” does not exist – only what “is”. We have no control over other people’s beliefs, actions or behaviors – people aren’t what we think or wish they “should” be – they simply “are”.
Acceptance is achieved by letting go of our expectations and planting ourselves firmly in what “is” – for that is reality, the only thing that matters. Focusing on anything else is a waste of time, energy and health and it really is as simple as that. The next time you find yourself getting angry or frustrated about something you simply can’t do anything about, calmly remind yourself to focus on what you can control (your reaction) and let go what you cannot (everything else).

“Happiness equals reality minus expectations.” – Tom Magliozzi

Mindfulness

Mindfulness is about being in the moment – not dwelling on the past, not worrying about the future, simply being where you are right now and experiencing only that. Practicing and cultivating mindfulness relieved a tremendous amount of stress and anxiety in my life. I lived in a constant state of worry, frustration and panic and I didn’t even know it.

When I first started learning about mindfulness, my first step was to simply notice when I started getting into these obsessive thought cycles (about work, about whoever I was dating, about what had to get done, or what I should have said, or what this person thought of me… are they mad at me? Did I piss them off somehow? Oh my god, I have so much work to do tomorrow, I’m never going to get everything done. On and on and on and on!)

So I learned to take notice of this, and interrupt myself. I would touch something nearby (a wall, a piece of furniture, etc.) and take three very deep breaths. Breathe in, hold for a few seconds, and breathe out. It was a 30 second break to remind myself that wherever I was, whatever I was doing – it was the only thing that I could be doing, the only thing that mattered. I practiced and repeated this simple exercise whenever and wherever I could: taking a shower, shaving, brushing my teeth, driving, writing, playing my guitar, walking, spending time with someone. After a month or two (of daily practice), it became habit.

Soon enough, it seemed almost anything that I was doing could be seen as an opportunity to practice being present. Walking, washing dishes, cleaning the house, writing a song, driving. I found so many opportunities to practice mindfulness in my daily routines and it helped me to become more patient, kind and focused. You can only exist in this moment. Practice being fully present in whatever it is that you are doing.

Gratitude

In my darkest times, I was focused solely on everything that I wanted or needed or didn’t have. I focused on how successful or happy others were (in my eyes) and wasted all my time wishing my life or house or family was more like theirs. It was an endless cycle of negativity and wanting – nothing was ever good enough. It’s easy to get stuck in a thought pattern of what we wish we had, or to focus on what other’s have that we don’t – but it’s pointless and insignificant to live by comparison when the reality is that we have so much to be grateful for everyday.

What we need to survive is a very short list: air, food, water, shelter, and human connection. Everything else is a want, a luxury, a gift – and these gifts should be reflected on and appreciated. As I learned to practice gratitude, on a daily basis, for everything and everyone that I had in my life, what was missing became insignificant.

Take some time each morning when you rise and each night before going to sleep to reflect on the gifts in your life. Even in my darkest hours there were people, experiences and gifts each day that I could be grateful for. Keep a gratitude journal, take lots of pictures, create photo albums – reminders of who and what you are thankful for and surround yourself with these things.

Yes, there are hard times – financial hardships, job losses, breakups, accidents, injuries, sicknesses, challenges, obstacles, uncertainties and minor everyday irritations. We all face this stuff throughout our lives, and nobody’s life is perfect or without struggle (no matter how perfect you think it is). There are ups and downs, sometimes we have less, sometimes we have more – but there are things to be grateful for in our lives everyday and THAT is what we need to shift our focus to. Once you learn how to adopt an “attitude of gratitude” you’ll find that the grass is green on your side too.


Building a Foundation for Happiness
by Dennis Liegghio
http://www.detourproject.org/

Gratefulness is the key to a happy life that we hold in our hands, because if we are not grateful, then no matter how much we have we will not be happy -- because we will always want to have something else or something more. ~Brother David Steindl-Rast


Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity.... It turns problems into gifts, failures into success, the unexpected into perfect timing, and mistakes into important events. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow. ~ Melodie Beattie

Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace and gratitude. ~Denis Waitley


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Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Give Thanks at All Times - Good and Bad

It is really easy to be thankful when things are going well. But how do we stay thankful when they are not? It may be difficult, but practicing gratitude at all times is one of the best ways to make it through setbacks and disappointments. It keeps us hopeful and reminds us that we made it through hard times before. It helps us to see that life is still good. Circumstances may be negative, but they can change. People may hurt us, but we can heal. Losses may never be recovered, but we can gain something new. The more we practice gratitude for what is good, right, beautiful and hopeful, the more real it becomes to us. So whether we are going through some bad times or the best of times, it is always appropriate and empowering to be thankful.

Following is a poem that helps remind us why we can be thankful at all times.

Be Thankful

Be thankful that you don’t already have everything you desire,
If you did, what would there be to look forward to?

Be thankful when you don’t know something
For it gives you the opportunity to learn.

Be thankful in the difficult times.
During those times you grow.

Be thankful when you have limitations
Because they give you opportunities for improvement.

Be thankful for each new challenge
Because it will build your strength and character.

Be thankful for your mistakes
They will teach you valuable lessons.

Be thankful when you’re tired and weary
Because it means you’ve made a difference.

It is easy to be thankful for the good things.
A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who are also thankful during the setbacks.

Gratitude can turn a negative into a positive.
Find a way to be thankful in the midst of your troubles
and they can become your blessings.

~ Author unknown.



Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity... It turns problems into gifts, failures into success, the unexpected into perfect timing, and mistakes into important events. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow. ~Melody Beattie

If you concentrate on finding whatever is good in every situation, you will discover that your life will suddenly be filled with gratitude, a feeling that nurtures the soul. ~Rabbi Harold Kushner

A thankful person is thankful under all circumstances. A complaining soul complains even if he lives in paradise. ~Baha’u’llah

He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has. ~Epictetus


Find the good and praise it. ~Alex Haley


Give thanks for a little and you will find a lot. ~Hausa of Nigeria


If you want to turn your life around, try thankfulness. It will change your life mightily. ~Gerald Good




Copyright © 2010 Krystal Kuehn, New Day Counseling Services. All Rights Reserved.



Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a licensed professional counselor, author, teacher, and musician. She specializes in helping people live their best life now, reach their full potential, overcome barriers, heal from their past, and develop a lifestyle of health, happiness, and love. Krystal is the cofounder of NewDayCounseling.org, a relationship counseling, family counseling center, specializing in helping individuals, couples and families with professional counseling services for relationship problems, parenting issues, depression, anxiety as well a s substance abuse DUI classes, anger management groups, and more. Krystal is also cofounder of StopSuicideSong.com, BeHappy4Life.com , NewSongProductions.com as well as Facebook.com/WordsOfInspiration and several blogs.







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Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Slow Down

Slow Down by Dennis Liegghio (excerpt from Building a Foundation for Happiness )

We often generate unnecessary worry, stress and anxiety for ourselves. We can reduce our level of stress, worry and anxiety by learning how to slow down. You don’t NEED to be constantly “connected” (cell phones, email, texting, Facebook, Twitter, etc.) The age of information has become the age of distraction and we are stressing ourselves out. We are constantly bombarded by the information and distractions that we have available at our fingertips (along with a ridiculous amount of advertising for things that we don’t need) and it has trashed our attention spans. Life offers so many moments of joy and wonder, but if you are moving too fast, you’ll never notice them.

Give yourself some time away from these distractions – shut off your phone an hour or two before going to bed, wait until you’ve gotten ready before turning it back on in the morning. Check your email, Facebook, Twitter, etc. at certain times throughout the day and then log off. Leave your cell phone behind (or at least on silent) when you are eating, or visiting with someone. When you are driving around in a vehicle that can take your life, or the lives of others at a moments notice, you do not need to be talking on your cell phone or texting someone or updating your Facebook status. Believe me, whatever it is, it can wait until you are where you need to be, safe and sound.

You are only capable of doing one thing at a time, so set your priorities and focus on doing ONE thing at a time. Multi-tasking and rushing around only leads to stress and mistakes. You may think you’re being more efficient, but you end up creating more headaches for yourself.

You can practice slowing down in almost any moment. When you are showering, brushing your teeth, washing dishes, etc., try to focus solely on that experience. This takes time and practice, and you will be shocked at how often your brain automatically leads you into other thoughts about the past and the future, but realize when that is happening, and gently bring yourself back to concentrating only on the task at hand.

Suggestions for Slowing Down:

Building a Foundation for Happiness
by Dennis Liegghio
http://www.detourproject.org/



At the root of much worry is the issue of control. When we feel out of control, we worry. When events are beyond our control, we worry. Like it or not, however, much of life remains beyond our control. It takes a lot of energy to try to control the uncontrollable. There is another way--if we can learn to embrace uncertainty, we will be able to live in peace, even in the midst of great uncertainty.~ Daniel Grippo


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    Tuesday, November 1, 2011

    8 Simple Ways to Be Your Best

    If we stop to think about it, there are so many things to be grateful for. As I was reflecting on all the good things, people, and blessings I enjoy, I starting compiling a long list. It seemed it would never end. In all actually, it never will end because our blessings are new every morning. In this article, I share eight simple ways to be your best.  I believe we can all be grateful for the opportunities we have and the freedom we have to choose to be our best every day.   

    1. We can be free from negativity.
    A while back I decided that I was going to stay away from as many negative influences as I possibly could. I ended some unhealthy relationships in the process. I realized that being around critical, negative people was not only unpleasant, but it rubbed off on me. Being around more optimistic, hopeful people surrounded me with a positive influence that was energizing and motivating. I can minimize negative influences in my life by making better choices in what I watch and read as well. Good and wholesome, edifying and positive influences help to keep my mind and emotions healthy.

    2. We can have peace in my minds and hearts.

    Fear, worry, anxiety and depression…They all rob me of inner peace. Whenever I get overwhelmed with stress and its negative effects, I immediately take a time out. I know how discouragement can keep us down if we let it. It leads to self-pity and ultimately to defeat and despair. Years of experience have taught me that bad times don’t last forever. Things that seem so pressing right now are not as important as I make them to be in the big scheme of things. I remind myself: this too shall pass. I slow myself down. I recall the source of my help and the many times I have overcome in the past. I draw on my inner strengths and trust in God to help me. As busyness and distractions subside, I begin to see things from a more realistic and hopeful perspective. I become free of things that once bound me and shook my confidence, threatened my security, and dimmed my hope. I have new courage to take necessary steps for change. I gain wisdom and learn to accept what is not in my control. Peace returns to my mind and heart.

    3. We can learn from our mistakes.

    When I make mistakes or say and do things I later regret, I found that I end up with two choices. I can either entertain feelings of guilt, regret, anger, blame, or I can take responsibility, apologize if necessary, and learn from my mistakes and regrets. Beating myself up over something doesn’t really teach me a lesson. It just makes me more upset and frustrated with myself. Realizing this has taught me the importance of forgiving myself and accepting that I am not perfect, no one is. I can extend the same grace to myself as I do to others when they miss it. I don’t want to punish them by constantly reminding them of their mistakes. Nor do I want to reject them for their human weaknesses and imperfections. In the same way, I will not punish myself by holding on to guilt, anger, and regret. I believe we can become better if we will learn from our mistakes and regrets, know when to let them go, and come out better as a result.

    4. We can learn to appreciate and like who we are.

    It’s not easy to love others when we do not love ourselves. Once I realized the importance of this simple truth, I decided to stop complaining about the things I didn’t like about who I am. Instead, I started to change the things I could and accept the things I could not change. As a result, I was more able to appreciate myself and my unique God-given gifts and talents. The more I did this, the more I noticed and received the appreciation and love I got from others. My desire to be my best really began to flourish and bring much joy to me. It was simply accepting and liking myself that enabled me to love and bless others with all that I am.

    5. We can have control over our thoughts.

    I can choose what I want to think about. Negative thoughts cannot stay if I do not allow them to. It seems the more we focus on something that is bothersome to us, the more if affects our mood and overall outlook. For this reason, I do not spend too much time thinking about life’s disappointments and losses. Instead, I think about how to overcome them and I recall past victories. I have control over my thoughts and I can focus on things that build my faith, make me strong and hopeful, and encourage me. Sometimes I need to remind myself that my thought life is in my control. No one can put thoughts in my mind that I have to receive. I can decide what will stay and what will go. Although I may not be able to control how I feel, I can control what I choose to think and dwell upon and what I choose to do.

    6. We can choose to forgive and be free.

    There is no prison like that of unforgiveness. It keeps us bound to bitterness, resentment, and unhappiness. It hurts us more than it hurts anyone else. For this reason, forgiving is more a benefit to us than it is to the person(s) who hurt us. I have learned that if my willingness to forgive is contingent on apologies or justice, it may never happen. I have to do it for me. It is not easy. Actually, it can be the most difficult thing we ever do for ourselves. Forgiving is a process. It begins with a decision to release whoever or whatever it is we are holding on to. I do this believing that people reap what they sow. You can’t sow thistles and expect to reap daffodils. When people sow deceit, gossip, greediness, selfishness, and so on, they reap its fruit. When I choose to sow forgiveness, I reap peace and freedom. I am thankful that my mind and emotions can heal when I forgive.

    7. We can know and experience love.

    I believe God is love and when we receive His amazing love, it works miracles in our lives. I once said: The power of love is amazing and never-ending. It can motivate, energize, inspire, and strengthen. Love can do in a person what nothing else can do. Love has the power to revive and change lives, restore relationships, and bring healing. All else may fail, but love never fails. When you think about it, most of the love we know and experience has to do with relationships. That is why I do a great deal of writing on the topic (The 10 Keys to Happy and Loving Relationships). Love is the foundation of healthy and successful relationships. Love is what we live for. I am thankful for the experience of giving and receiving love.

    8. We can live a lifestyle of true and lasting joy

    True and lasting happiness is not something we can pursue as much as it is a lifestyle we live. I have learned that our lives are made up of many habits. Some are good and some are bad. It all shapes who we are and contributes to our well-being and happiness. When we make a deliberate effort to be our best, we find we have to change some things. Since I came to this conclusion, I began to replace some old and bad habits with new and healthy ones. I practiced seeing the glass half full rather than half empty. I practiced patience to keep myself from acting on impulse. I allowed myself to make mistakes rather than be driven by perfection. I learned to relax and be at peace rather than become worried and anxious. It takes determination, self-discipline, and lots of practice to break old habits and establish new ones. Changing and improving our lifestyle is actually shaping our character and becoming our best. I want to fulfill my potential and I realize that the only way to do so is to live a lifestyle of health, happiness, and love. I am thankful that this is possible and I have all the tools I need to be all that I am destined to be. (for more info see The 9 Habits of Happy People)

    Far from being exhaustive, the above list is just a start to the many reasons I am thankful for the opportunities I have to be my best. In making this list, I am reminded of the very active role I need to take in maintaining good mental health. This list also helped me to identify the many things I can do to keep mentally and emotionally healthy.  How can you be your best every day?  I encourage you to add your own ideas and experiences to this list and be your best every day!




    Copyright 2010 All Rights Reserved. Written by Krystal Kuehn. NewDayCounseling.org & BeHappy4Life.com

    Every day do something that will inch you closer to a better tomorrow. ~Doug Firebaugh
    Be not afraid of growing slowly; be afraid only of standing still. ~Chinese Proverb

    Happiness is not a state to arrive at, but a manner of traveling. ~Margaret Lee Runbeck

    Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a licensed professional counselor, author, teacher, and musician. She specializes in helping people live their best life now, reach their full potential, overcome barriers, heal from their past, and develop a lifestyle of health, happiness, and love. Krystal is the cofounder of NewDayCounseling.org, a relationship counseling, family counseling center, specializing in helping individuals, couples and families with professional counseling services for relationship problems, parenting issues, depression, anxiety as well a s substance abuse classes, anger management groups, and more. Krystal is also cofounder of StopSuicideSong.com and BeHappy4Life.com as well as Facebook.com/WordsOfInspiration and several blogs.


    New Day Counseling is a marriage family counseling center that provides professional counseling services for the entire family. We help parents, children, teens, families, individuals and couples. We offer relationship counseling, couples counseling / marriage therapy, child therapy, adolescent counseling, anxiety counseling, depression counseling, divorce counseling, grief counseling, porn addiction counseling, substance abuse counseling. We also offer groups for anger counseling. Go to NewDayCounseling.org today for more information or call us at 248-649-8050. We are here to help, and we look forward to hearing from you.

    Love and Logic Parenting Classes help you with the most important job there is! You can learn practical tools & techniques for effective discipline, better communication, appropriate boundaries, healthy decision-making, & respectful adult-child relationships. Workshops are available at New Day Counseling in Troy. For more information or to register online go to: Love and Logic Parenting Class or call 248-649-8050.

    Put an end to anger problems & regain control over your life today. Anger management classes help for personal, court, and business. For more info go to newdaycounseling.org or call 248-649-8050 to register today. * Anger management class and/or individual anger counseling can be extremely supportive and helpful in equipping us with many tools for a better life.

    Are you experiencing addiction or substance use that is impacting your daily life? You are not alone! There are many people struggling with substance abuse and addiction! There are also many people who recover and live a drug free lifestyle. Come join our 6 week substance abuse group to discover the pathway to freedom! One Day at A Time! For substance abuse group and/or individual substance abuse counseling, call or visit us today.

    Learn to handle & stabilize your emotions, lessen depression, and improve your relationships by learning coping skills, de-stressing techniques, and ways to change negative thought patterns with Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. Call 248-649-8050 to register for DBT Adult Anxiety and Depression Support Group today.

    Self-Esteem Group for Teen Girls (ages 13-17)
    Teen girls learn to feel empowered, gain self-awareness, develop positive coping, and improve daily problem-solving skills. Through G.I.R.L.S. (Girls in Real Life Situations) counseling curriculum, group discussion, and fun activities, girls will learn more about themselves and be better equipped to handle Real Life Situations. Call 248-649-8050 today to register. For more information, go to New Day Counseling Center. We also offer individual teenage counseling.




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    Monday, October 24, 2011

    Perspective - It's All the Way You Look At It

    There is little difference in people, but that difference makes a big difference. The little difference is attitude. The big difference is whether it is positive or negative. ~W.Clement Stone

    We might describe ourselves as an optimist, a pessimist, or somewhere in-between. But regardless who is right or wrong about a matter, it is the optimist that always tends to be the one who is more hopeful and happy. Join me as we experience a typical day in the life of an optimist and a pessimist. The following story is about perspective and how the same situation can be experienced so differently:

    Early Saturday morning the optimist awakens with anticipation and gratitude for the new day. He looks forward to getting together with his friend for a stroll in the park. The pessimist awakens to another day expecting more of the same—the same problems, frustrations, and negativity. When they greet each other at the park, the optimist comments on what a beautiful, sunny day it is. The pessimist says, “You never know how long it will last. It could get cloudy and rain as far as we know.”

    Along their way, the Optimist notices a group of teenagers playing ball and blaring a radio near by them. The Optimist says, “It’s so nice to see young people having so much fun together—playing sports and getting exercise.” “You can’t be serious,” retorts the Pessimist. “Teens are troublemakers. Listen to that horrible music. They’re all angry and rebellious. And, on top of that, they get so aggressive in sports, I’m surprised there are not more injuries.”

    Next, they walk to the bridge and see a sign stating that the bridge is temporarily closed due to construction. The Optimist suggests, “Let’s go around another way. It’ll be just as nice and we can enjoy the scenery along the other side of the park. The Pessimist angrily replies, “Taxpayer dollars are being wasted again. The bridge was just fine. Now we have to take the long way around because of their incompetence.”

    On the other side of the Park, the Optimist notices a couple playfully hugging and kissing. “That is so beautiful! It looks like they’re in love.” “Yeah, right,” exclaims the Pessimist. “They’re just putting on a show. If they want to be all affectionate and loving, they shouldn’t be in a public place.”

    The stroll in the park continued along in the same predictable manner. And later that evening, when both the Optimist and Pessimist were asked by friends how their day went, The Optimist shared, “It was a great day. The park was filled with people having fun, and there was so much to see and enjoy.” The Pessimist described his day saying, “There is nothing good about this town. Annoying people are everywhere. The bridge was even down, and there really wasn’t much to like about it.”

    Wow, What a difference in perspective! Is there any wonder why the Pessimist remains negative and oftentimes is unhappy? First, he doesn’t expect the nice weather to last. He is actually expressing the attitude that some people have—that nothing good ever lasts for very long, so don’t expect it and you won’t be disappointed. Then, he generalizes that all teens are angry and rebellious. When the bridge is closed, instead of making the best of the situation, he complains and blames others. And later, he gets annoyed by displays of love and affection.

    The Optimist, on the other hand, focuses on the good things—and spends his day appreciating and enjoying it. When obstacles arise, he copes in a healthy manner and doesn’t let it ruin his day or attitude.

    Now, who would you rather be around? Or, I should ask, what perspective would you rather have? Most of us would like to be more like the Optimist. The Optimist is more likely to have inner joy,  peace, and hope. The Optimist is loving towards others. And, the Optimist has inner strength to cope with life’s challenges.

    I’d like to encourage you that with practice, we can ALL become more optimistic in our outlook.

    I hope you have a great week & see all the good in it!


    Pessimism leads to weakness, optimism to power. ~William James

    Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by the attitude you bring to life; not so much by what happens to you as by the way your mind looks at what happens. ~ Kahlil Gibran

    A pessimist is one who makes difficulties of his opportunities and an optimist is one who makes opportunities of his difficulties."~ Harry Truman

    The only disability in life is a bad attitude. ~Scott Hamilton


    Could we change our attitude, we should not only see life differently, but life itself would come to be different. ~Katherine Mansfield


    Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things. ~Robert Brault


    Perspective - It's All the Way You Look At It - written by Krystal Kuehn
    Copyright © 2008 New Day Counseling Services



    New Day Counseling Services is a family marriage counseling center that provides professional counseling services for the entire family. We help parents, children, teens, families, individuals and couples. We offer couples therapy / relationship counseling, child therapy, teenage counseling, anxiety counseling, depression counseling, divorce counseling, grief counseling, porn addiction counseling, substance abuse counseling. We also offer groups for anger counseling. Go to NewDayCounseling.org today for more information or call us at 248-649-8050. We are here to help, and we look forward to hearing from you.

    Put an end to anger problems & regain control over your life today. Anger management classes help for personal, court, and business. For more info go to newdaycounseling.org or call 248-649-8050 to register today. * Anger management classes and/or individual anger counseling can be extremely supportive and helpful in equipping us with many tools for a better life.

    Are you experiencing addiction or substance use that is impacting your daily life? You are not alone! There are many people struggling with substance abuse and addiction! There are also many people who recover and live a drug free lifestyle. Come join our 6 week substance abuse group to discover the pathway to freedom! One Day at A Time! For substance abuse classes and/or individual substance abuse counseling, call or visit us today.

    Learn to handle & stabilize your emotions, lessen depression, and improve your relationships by learning coping skills, de-stressing techniques, and ways to change negative thought patterns with Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. Call 248-649-8050 to register for DBT Adult Anxiety & Depression Support Group .

    Love and Logic Parenting Classes help you with the most important job there is! You can learn practical tools & techniques for effective discipline, better communication, appropriate boundaries, healthy decision-making, & respectful adult-child relationships. Workshops are available at New Day Counseling in Troy. For more information or to register online go to: Love and Logic Parenting Class or call 248-649-8050.

    Self-Esteem Group for Teen Girls (ages 13-17)
    Teen girls learn to feel empowered, gain self-awareness, develop positive coping, and improve daily problem-solving skills. Through G.I.R.L.S. (Girls in Real Life Situations) counseling curriculum, group discussion, and fun activities, girls will learn more about themselves and be better equipped to handle Real Life Situations. Call 248-649-8050 today to register. For more information, go to New Day Counseling Services. We also offer individual teenage counseling.



    << Back to Be Your Best Home

    Monday, October 17, 2011

    Are We Falling Out of Love? (from Help Save My Marriage Counseling Series)

    A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.  ~Mignon McLaughlin

    Before a marriage or relationship ends, one or both partners usually claim that they are no longer “in love”. The passion, affection, and harmony that were once present are now replaced with disagreements, emotional withdrawal and physical distancing.

    Relationships grow and develop as partners change and adapt to life and each other. It is an ongoing process. At the beginning of a new relationship, love is intoxicating. Differences and incompatibilities go unnoticed. This highly enjoyable stage of a relationship doesn’t last forever. Soon after the excitement wears off, partners have an opportunity to get to know and accept each other for who they really are. It is at this point that they discover the hard work that happy and successful relationships require.

    Every relationship has conflicts. When they arise, a couple’s love and commitment will be tested. The real difference between a successful marriage or relationship and a troubled one is the level of their commitment to work through problems and challenges. Couples who do not stay committed through the difficult times usually end up getting divorced. Successful couples work on resolving their conflicts. They persevere and stay committed to the relationship. If they cannot resolve their conflicts together, they seek help including professional help such as marriage counseling. On the contrary, a relationship with unresolved conflicts grows distant. Eventually, layers upon layers of hurt feelings, insecurities, and unresolved issues develop which lead to more serious relationship problems.

    Most couples want their marriages to work. For most, it’s a matter of rekindling their love and acceptance of one another, learning how to resolve conflicts, becoming better listeners, and resolving to stay committed to each other. There is no perfect marriage or relationship. Marriages go through changes and allow partners to grow closer and deeper in love as a result.

    Falling out of love usually means falling out of commitment. If you want to fall back in love, it begins with a commitment to your partner. Are you willing to resolve your conflicts when they occur rather than ignore them or allow them escalate? Share your feelings and thoughts with love and acceptance rather than criticism and judgment? Focus on what you like about each other rather than what can be improved? Accept your differences and agree that you can disagree and still love and respect each other? Be thankful for and appreciate your partner? Make time for each other? Show your partner respect and love every day? Get professional help if you need it?

    Being in love is one of the greatest experiences in the world. It’s more than a good feeling that eventually fades. It’s an intimate connection with another human being unlike any other. It involves a life commitment that surpasses feelings and reaches deep into the soul where true love resides. This love lasts forever and is unconditional. It is not dependent upon feelings or circumstances. It is eternal and true. It is a love every marriage can experience.

    Relationships can be restored. Love can be rekindled. Marriages can be happy and succeed. Sometimes what is needed more than anything else is some insight and a few skills in key relationship areas such as communication, commitment, sexuality and intimacy, conflict resolution, money issues, romance, crisis, cheat-proofing your marriage.

    Rather than enduring an unhappy or troubled marriage, or becoming another statistic of divorce, make today a new day of commitment to your marriage! Get some help that can make all the difference and save your relationship today!


    Are We Falling Out of Love? (from Help Save My Marriage Counseling Series)
    Copyright © 2009 New Day Family Marriage Counseling written by Krystal Kuehn
    This article is a part of the Help Save My Marriage Counseling collection by Krystal.

    Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a licensed professional counselor, author, teacher, and musician. She specializes in helping people live their best life now, reach their full potential, overcome barriers, heal from their past, and develop a lifestyle of health, happiness, and love. Krystal is the cofounder of NewDayCounseling.org, a relationship counseling, family counseling center, specializing in helping individuals, couples and families with professional counseling services for relationship problems, parenting issues, depression, anxiety as well a s substance abuse classes, anger management groups, and more. Krystal is also cofounder of StopSuicideSong.com and BeHappy4Life.com as well as Facebook.com/WordsOfInspiration and several blogs.


    We are not the same persons this year as last; nor are those we love. It is a happy chance if we,          changing, continue to love a changed person.  ~W. Somerset Maugham
     It is impossible to fall out of love. Love is such a powerful emotion, that once it envelops you it does not depart. True love is eternal. If you think that you were once in love, but fell out of it, then it wasn't love you were in. There are no 'exit' signs in love, there is only an 'on' ramp. ~unknown

    The difficulty with marriage is that we fall in love with a personality, but musst live with a character. ~Peter De Vrie


    New Day Counseling is a family marriage counseling center that provides professional counseling services for the entire family. We help parents, children, teens, families, individuals and couples. We offer couples therapy / marriage counseling, child therapy, adolescent counseling, anxiety counseling, depression counseling, divorce counseling, grief counseling, porn addiction counseling, substance abuse counseling. We also offer groups for anger counseling. Go to NewDayCounseling.org today for more information or call us at 248-649-8050. We are here to help, and we look forward to hearing from you.

    Put an end to anger problems & regain control over your life today. Anger management classes help for personal, court, and business. For more info go to newdaycounseling.org or call 248-649-8050 to register today. * Anger management classes and/or individual anger counseling can be extremely supportive and helpful in equipping us with many tools for a better life.

    Are you experiencing addiction or substance use that is impacting your daily life? You are not alone! There are many people struggling with substance abuse and addiction! There are also many people who recover and live a drug free lifestyle. Come join our 6 week substance abuse group to discover the pathway to freedom! One Day at A Time! For substance abuse classes and/or individual substance abuse counseling, call or visit us today.

    Learn to handle & stabilize your emotions, lessen depression, and improve your relationships by learning coping skills, de-stressing techniques, and ways to change negative thought patterns with Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. Call 248-649-8050 to register for DBT ADULT DEPRESSION & ANXIETY SUPPORT GROUP

    Love and Logic Parenting Classes help you with the most important job there is! You can learn practical tools & techniques for effective discipline, better communication, appropriate boundaries, healthy decision-making, & respectful adult-child relationships. Workshops are available at New Day Counseling in Troy. For more information or to register online go to: Love and Logic Parenting Class or call 248-649-8050.

    Self-Esteem Group for Teen Girls (ages 13-17)
    Teen girls learn to feel empowered, gain self-awareness, develop positive coping, and improve daily problem-solving skills. Through G.I.R.L.S. (Girls in Real Life Situations) counseling curriculum, group discussion, and fun activities, girls will learn more about themselves and be better equipped to handle Real Life Situations. Call 248-649-8050 today to register. For more information, visit newdaycounseling.org.  We also offer individual teenage counseling.

    << Back to Be Your Best Home

    Monday, October 3, 2011

    What Are We Holding On to? (from Help Save My Marriage Counseling Series)

    You know something is wrong in your marriage. Love is not the problem. You love each other although you do not always act like it. Commitment to the relationship and to stay together through hardships may not be the problem either. But, there is something that continues to keep you apart emotionally, physically, intimately.

    There was a time when you felt secure and safe together. If you hurt each other, you apologized or showed somehow that you were really sorry. You did not let tensions build or hold grudges. You wanted to continue getting along and enjoying being together. But over time, some conflicts never really got resolved. They could have been pushed under the rug or become triggers to major blowouts. Over time, habits and differences became more annoying and more difficult to accept. Blame instead of shared responsibility became the norm. Personal attacks or insults became the more common reaction to feeling rejected, angry, or hurt. Instead of going to each other for support, comfort, and love, you began to distance yourselves from each other. It is as though your hearts were growing cold.

    Distancing in a relationship keeps people apart on all levels. You do not have the trust you once had for your partner so you do not draw close emotionally. You do not feel the same affection and attraction because there is greater focus on what you do not like, respect, or appreciate about your partner. Distancing leads to greater problems if couples do not make efforts to draw close to one another.

    What keeps couples in this dangerous state? It might start with pride or a sense of self-sufficiency, but it eventually becomes a hardened heart. A heart that is hardened blocks the flow of love. It forfeits peace and acceptance. It holds on to unforgiveness. Unforgiveness is detrimental to any marriage or relationship. With unforgiveness, there is an underlying attitude that “you owe me.” Yes, perhaps, an apology was never given that should have been or you were not treated right. Maybe you were terribly wronged, mistreated, and hurt. Forgiving someone does not make it okay. What it does is set you free, free to love unconditionally, free to know inner peace, free to connect with others on a deeper level, free to enjoy life.

    Offenses and injustices need to be discussed and resolved. If they are not addressed in a relationship, they can lead to serious problems and keep a couple in a state of discontent. Think about anything that you have been holding on to that has blocked the flow of love in your heart. A hard heart can be softened, but you must choose to let love in. Will you open your heart? Will you face what has hurt you and work through it until you can release the hold it has on you?

    Can a marriage be saved when there is unforgiveness and hardened hearts? Yes, it can when you decide to open your heart by releasing all that is holding love back. Let love in. Love is a healing balm that makes you whole—emotionally, spiritually, and physically. Love unites. If softens and fills you with hope and peace. It lifts the heaviness that weighed you down for far too long. Marriages can be restored when offenses are released and forgiveness takes place. Soften your hearts towards one another and make room for love to grow. Love has always been there, but it was blocked. Let forgiveness unblock its flow today and save your marriage! 

    You and your partner may really want your marriage to work and do what it takes to save your relationship, but you may not know just where to begin or how to make the changes necessary.  A marriage counselor can help you reach your goals and restore the love and respect needed to make your marriage work.  You have a great deal to hold on to and believe in for your marriage.  It can get better, stronger, and closer than ever before if you get the help you need today and hold on to the hope of having a happy and successful marriage for a lifetime.

    Now join hands, and with your hands your hearts . ~~ William Shakespeare

    The ultimate test of a relationship is to disagree but to hold hands. ~Alexandra Penney

    Never say goodbye when you still want to try. Never give up when you feel you can still take it. Never say you don’t love that person anymore when you can’t let go. ~unknown




    What Are We Holding On to? (from Save My Marriage Counseling Series)
    Copyright © 2009 Krystal Kuehn, New Day Counseling Center
     This article is a part of the Help Save My Marriage Counseling collection by Krystal.

    Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a licensed professional counselor, author, teacher, and musician. She specializes in helping people live their best life now, reach their full potential, overcome barriers, heal from their past, and develop a lifestyle of health, happiness, and love. Krystal is the cofounder of NewDayCounseling.org, a relationship counseling, family counseling center, specializing in helping individuals, couples and families with professional counseling services for relationship problems, parenting issues, depression, anxiety as well a s substance abuse classes, anger management groups, and more. Krystal is also cofounder of StopSuicideSong.com and BeHappy4Life.com as well as Facebook.com/WordsOfInspiration and several blogs.




    New Day Counseling is a family marriage counseling center that provides professional counseling services for the entire family. We help parents, children, teens, families, individuals and couples. We offer couples therapy / marriage counseling, child therapy, adolescent counseling, anxiety counseling, depression counseling, divorce counseling, grief counseling, porn addiction counseling, substance abuse counseling. We also offer groups for anger counseling. Go to NewDayCounseling.org today for more information or call us at 248-649-8050. We are here to help, and we look forward to hearing from you.



    Put an end to anger problems & regain control over your life today. Anger management classes help for personal, court, and business. For more info go to newdaycounseling.org or call 248-649-8050 to register today. * Anger management classes and/or individual anger counseling can be extremely supportive and helpful in equipping us with many tools for a better life.


    Are you experiencing addiction or substance use that is impacting your daily life? You are not alone! There are many people struggling with substance abuse and addiction! There are also many people who recover and live a drug free lifestyle. Come join our 6 week substance abuse group to discover the pathway to freedom! One Day at A Time! For substance abuse classes and/or individual substance abuse counseling, call or visit us today.


    Learn to handle & stabilize your emotions, lessen depression, and improve your relationships by learning coping skills, de-stressing techniques, and ways to change negative thought patterns with Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. Call 248-649-8050 to register for DBT ADULT DEPRESSION & ANXIETY SUPPORT GROUP


    Love and Logic Parenting Classes help you with the most important job there is! You can learn practical tools & techniques for effective discipline, better communication, appropriate boundaries, healthy decision-making, & respectful adult-child relationships. Workshops are available at New Day Counseling in Troy. For more information or to register online go to: Love and Logic Parenting Class or call 248-649-8050.


    Self-Esteem Group for Teen Girls (ages 13-17)
    Teen girls learn to feel empowered, gain self-awareness, develop positive coping, and improve daily problem-solving skills. Through G.I.R.L.S. (Girls in Real Life Situations) counseling curriculum, group discussion, and fun activities, girls will learn more about themselves and be better equipped to handle Real Life Situations. Call 248-649-8050 today to register. For more information, click here. We also offer individual teenage counseling.





    << Back to BeYourBest Home

    Monday, September 26, 2011

    Learning to Become All We Can Be

    It is already September and it's back to school for children as well as for adults pursuing higher education. As I was thinking about education, I thought about how we have so many opportunities to continue to learn every single day. If we stop learning, we stop living. Not only does learning help us grow, develop new skills, and prepare us for work and service, but it helps us to know and appreciate our world.

    I see education as a gift that leads us to freedom and insight. With education, we can become free of bad habits by learning what steps to take for real change. We can develop new skills by getting the necessary instruction we need. We can make better choices by getting direction that guides our path. We can maximize our potential as we learn more and put into practice what we already know. We can learn and relate to others better by learning from our mistakes.

    We are never too young or too old to learn something new. We just need to apply ourselves, listen, and learn. I believe education is freedom because the truth sets us free. Ignorance leads to bondage and keeps us from becoming all we can be. Let's encourage our children to value education and do their best. Develop a love for learning. Show respect for those who teach us. Seek wisdom, knowledge, and discernment. Learn from the experiences of everyday life. Let mistakes be life lessons. Let problems push us to learn and find solutions. Let challenges motivate us to conquer. And let us be thankful that life is an ongoing education. Living is a learning experience!

    May we all have another blessed year of learning and growing!

    Krystal


    Life Lessons Exercise:

    At the end of each day, write down 2-3 things you have learned throughout the day. It can be anything. You may have gained greater insight into something you already had some knowledge about. You may have learned an inspiring truth or a sad reality. You may have learned how to be or not to be from someone else's example. You may have learned a simple lesson from another person's good luck or misfortune. You may have learned that you are more special and loved than you had realized. The list never ends.

    This simple exercise can be very empowering. It can help us to recognize and appreciate our daily life experiences. It can help us to grow and become better than we were as we reflect and allow ourselves to learn from all life has to teach us.

    Life is a journey and an educational experience. What have you learned today?


    Learning to Become All We Can Be written by Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC
    New Day Counseling Center
    Copyright © 2009 BeHappy4Life.com, Krystal Kuehn




    The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.~Alvin Toffler

    Always walk through life as if you have something new to learn and you will. ~Vernon Howard

    You can teach a student a lesson for a day; but if you can teach him to learn by creating curiosity, he will continue the learning process as long as he lives. ~Clay P. Bedford


    By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest. ~ Confucius


    Life is a learning experience, only if you learn.~Yogi Berra


    I never teach my pupils; I only attempt to provide the conditions in which they can learn. ~ Albert Einstein


    Everyone and everything around you is your teacher.~Ken Keyes

    Tell me and I forget. Teach me and I remember. Involve me and I learn. ~Benjamin Franklin

    Life is a series of experiences, each one of which makes us bigger, even though sometimes it is hard to realize this. For the world was built to develop character, and we must learn that the setbacks and grieves which we endure help us in our marching onward. ~Henry Ford

    The only person who is educated is the one who has learned how to learn and change. ~Carl Rogers


    True learning can take place at every age of life, and it doesn't have to be in the curriculum plan. ~Suzanne Dale Ezell





    Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a licensed professional counselor, author, teacher, and musician. She specializes in helping people live their best life now, reach their full potential, overcome barriers, heal from their past, and develop a lifestyle of health, happiness, and love. Krystal is the cofounder of NewDayCounseling.org, a relationship counseling, family counseling center, specializing in helping individuals, couples and families with professional counseling services for relationship problems, parenting issues, depression, anxiety as well a s substance abuse classes, anger management groups, and more. Krystal is also cofounder of StopSuicideSong.com and BeHappy4Life.com as well as Facebook.com/WordsOfInspiration and several blogs.



    New Day Counseling is a marriage family counseling center that provides professional counseling services for the entire family. We help parents, children, teens, families, individuals and couples. We offer relationship counseling, couples counseling / marriage therapy, child therapy, adolescent counseling, anxiety counseling, depression counseling, divorce counseling, grief counseling, porn addiction counseling, substance abuse counseling. We also offer groups for anger counseling. Go to NewDayCounseling.org today for more information or call us at 248-649-8050. We are here to help, and we look forward to hearing from you.


    Love and Logic Parenting Classes help you with the most important job there is! You can learn practical tools & techniques for effective discipline, better communication, appropriate boundaries, healthy decision-making, & respectful adult-child relationships. Workshops are available at New Day Counseling in Troy. For more information or to register online go to: Love and Logic Parenting Class or call 248-649-8050.

    Put an end to anger problems & regain control over your life today. Anger management classes help for personal, court, and business. For more info go to newdaycounseling.org or call 248-649-8050 to register today. * Anger management class and/or individual anger counseling can be extremely supportive and helpful in equipping us with many tools for a better life.

    Are you experiencing addiction or substance use that is impacting your daily life? You are not alone! There are many people struggling with substance abuse and addiction! There are also many people who recover and live a drug free lifestyle. Come join our 6 week substance abuse group to discover the pathway to freedom! One Day at A Time! For substance abuse group and/or individual substance abuse counseling, call or visit us today.

    Learn to handle & stabilize your emotions, lessen depression, and improve your relationships by learning coping skills, de-stressing techniques, and ways to change negative thought patterns with Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. Call 248-649-8050 to register for DBT Adult Anxiety and Depression Support Group today.

    Self-Esteem Group for Teen Girls (ages 13-17)
    Teen girls learn to feel empowered, gain self-awareness, develop positive coping, and improve daily problem-solving skills. Through G.I.R.L.S. (Girls in Real Life Situations) counseling curriculum, group discussion, and fun activities, girls will learn more about themselves and be better equipped to handle Real Life Situations. Call 248-649-8050 today to register. For more information, go to New Day Counseling Center. We also offer individual teenage counseling.


    << Back to Be Your Best Home

    Thursday, September 15, 2011

    The Power of Choice

    Every day we make countless choices.  We may be tempted to quit, and we must choose if we will persevere.  We may want to cry because of a mistake we have made, but we can choose to laugh at ourselves instead.  We can allow our anger to become bitter and hateful, or we can choose to release it and let love work in and through us.  Excuses can be made for why we procrastinate, or we can choose to take responsibility and action.  The words we say and the things we do don't just happen.  We choose the words we speak.  We choose our attitudes. And we choose our actions and behaviors.  That is a pretty big responsibility.  No one besides us is responsible for our choices.  Sure, they may influence them, but ultimately our choices are up to us.  

    What a privilege, what a freedom we have! Within our power is the ability to make choices that can change our lives and destinies.  Within our power is the ability to make choices that can positively or negatively influence others and our world.  Within our power is the ability choose what can bring life instead of death to dreams, hopes, and visions.  Our choices have lasting impact on us, others, and our world. May we take this remarkable privilege seriously and use it for good every day of our lives!!

    USE WISELY YOUR POWER OF CHOICE

    Choose to love rather than hate.

    Choose to laugh rather than cry.

    Choose to create rather than destroy.

    Choose to persevere rather than quit.

    Choose to praise rather than gossip.

    Choose to heal rather than wound.

    Choose to give rather than steal.

    Choose to act rather than procrastinate.

    Choose to grow rather than rot.

    Choose to pray rather than curse.

    Choose to live rather than die.

               ~Og Mandino


    There may be a thousand little choices in a day. All of them count.  * You may think that in life, a lot of things happen to you along the way. The truth is, in life, you happen to a lot of things along the way. * Choosing to live your life by your own choice is the greatest freedom you will ever have.  ~Shad Helmstetter

    Destiny is not a matter of chance. It is a matter of choice: it is not to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved. ~William Jennings Bryant

    We choose our joys and sorrows long before we experience them. ~Kahlil Gibran


    Every morning when I get up, the first thing I decide is:  What do I want?  Misery? Blisfullness?   What am I going to choose today?  And it happens that I always choose blissfulness.  It is my choice, it is my life.  ~Adullah

    Life's not about expecting, hoping and wishing, it's about doing, being and becoming.  It's about the choices you've just made, and the ones you're about to make, it's about the things you choose to say - today.  It's about what you're gonna do after you finish reading this. ~Mike Dooley

    This bright, new day... complete with 24 hours of opportunities, choices, and attitudes… a perfectly matched set of 1440 minutes.This unique gift, this one day, cannot be exchanged, replaced or refunded. Handle with care. Make the most of it. There is only one to a customer. ~Author Unknown


    Copyright © 2011 Krystal Kuehn, New Day Counseling Center. All Rights Reserved.




    Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a licensed professional counselor, author, teacher, and musician. She specializes in helping people live their best life now, reach their full potential, overcome barriers, heal from their past, and develop a lifestyle of health, happiness, and love. Krystal is the cofounder of NewDayCounseling.org, a relationship counseling, family counseling center, specializing in helping individuals, couples and families with professional counseling services for relationship problems, parenting issues, depression, anxiety as well a s substance abuse classes, anger management groups, and more. Krystal is also cofounder of StopSuicideSong.com and BeHappy4Life.com as well as Facebook.com/WordsOfInspiration and several blogs.



    New Day Counseling is a family couples counseling center that provides professional counseling services for the entire family. We help parents, children, teens, families, individuals and couples. We offer relationship counseling, couples counseling / marriage therapy, child therapy, adolescent counseling, anxiety counseling, depression counseling, divorce counseling, grief counseling, porn addiction counseling, substance abuse counseling. We also offer groups for anger counseling. Go to NewDayCounseling.org today for more information or call us at 248-649-8050. We are here to help, and we look forward to hearing from you.

    Love and Logic Parenting Classes help you with the most important job there is! You can learn practical tools & techniques for effective discipline, better communication, appropriate boundaries, healthy decision-making, & respectful adult-child relationships. Workshops are available at New Day Counseling in Troy. For more information or to register online go to: Love and Logic Parenting Class or call 248-649-8050.

    Put an end to anger problems & regain control over your life today. Anger management classes help for personal, court, and business. For more info go to newdaycounseling.org or call 248-649-8050 to register today. * Anger management class and/or individual anger counseling can be extremely supportive and helpful in equipping us with many tools for a better life.

    Are you experiencing addiction or substance use that is impacting your daily life? You are not alone! There are many people struggling with substance abuse and addiction! There are also many people who recover and live a drug free lifestyle. Come join our 6 week substance abuse group to discover the pathway to freedom! One Day at A Time! For substance abuse group and/or individual substance abuse counseling, call or visit us today.


    Learn to handle & stabilize your emotions, lessen depression, and improve your relationships by learning coping skills, de-stressing techniques, and ways to change negative thought patterns with Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. Call 248-649-8050 to register for DBT Adult Anxiety & Depression Support Group today.

    Self-Esteem Group for Teen Girls (ages 13-17)
    Teen girls learn to feel empowered, gain self-awareness, develop positive coping, and improve daily problem-solving skills. Through G.I.R.L.S. (Girls in Real Life Situations) counseling curriculum, group discussion, and fun activities, girls will learn more about themselves and be better equipped to handle Real Life Situations. Call 248-649-8050 today to register. For more information, go to New Day Counseling Center. We also offer individual teenage counseling.


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    Tuesday, September 13, 2011

    When Is It Safe to Leave Kids Home Alone?

    We leave our children with babysitters, teachers, child care workers and other parents, but when is it safe to leave them home alone? The most common age for children to stay home alone is usually 12 years old. Most states have not enacted legislation regarding the age when children can be left unsupervised. Therefore, it is up to the parent to make a responsible decision that is most appropriate for both them and the child.

    A child should not be left home alone until both the parent and child are ready. It is normal for parents to feel a little anxious when they first leave their child home alone. The parent will need to feel that the child can be trusted to be responsible when left unsupervised.

    The experience of being home alone requires the child to be more independent. The child will need to feel confident and safe. It is important to prepare and teach the child some safety rules. For example, a child should know what to do in case of an emergency, if someone comes to the door, or if a stranger calls. Phone numbers need to be available. The parent should also be able to get in contact with the child by phone at all times. The child also needs to be sure that he or she can get a hold of the parent if necessary.

    When leaving children home alone, it is best to start with short periods of time so both the parent and child can become accustomed to this new responsibility that the child is entrusted with. It is best to start with a few practice runs lasting a half hour or so with the parent nearby and easily accessible. It can eventually build up to a couple of hours as long as the parent and child are comfortable with the arrangements.

    There should be clear rules when children stay home alone and unsupervised. First, they must understand the importance of following the rules for their safety. Some rules can include:

    > Do not answer the door (or phone, unless it is parent)
    > Keep doors and windows locked
    > Do not leave house while parent is gone
    > Have contact phone numbers readily available
    > Complete assigned chores or homework
    > Depending on age, there should be specific rules about cooking and kitchen safety
    > Have set TV time and shows allowed
    > Have computer/internet rules

    Leaving children home alone is something all parents eventually have to do as their children become more independent. By taking simple steps to set some rules and make it safe, it can be a very good, growing experience for both children and their parents.

    "Safety First" is "Safety Always." ~Charles M. Hayes

    Nothing in life is to be feared, it is only to be understood. Now is the time to understand more, so that we may fear less. ~- Marie Curie

    When you're prepared, you're more confident. When you have a strategy, you're more comfortable. ~Fred Couples

    Children are apt to live up to what you believe of them.  ~Lady Bird Johnson


    The best training any parent can give a child is to train the child to train himself. ~A. P. Gouthey

    If you want children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders. ~Abigail Van Buren



    Few things help an individual more than to place responsibility upon him, and to let him know that you trust him. ~Booker T. Washington













    Copyright © 2010 Krystal Kuehn, New Day Counseling Center. All Rights Reserved.


    Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a licensed professional counselor, author, teacher, and musician. She specializes in helping people live their best life now, reach their full potential, overcome barriers, heal from their past, and develop a lifestyle of health, happiness, and love. Krystal is the cofounder of NewDayCounseling.org, a marriage counseling, family counseling center, specializing in helping individuals, couples and families with professional counseling services for relationship problems, parenting issues, depression, anxiety as well a s substance abuse classes, anger management groups, and more. Krystal is also cofounder of StopSuicideSong.com and BeHappy4Life.com as well as Facebook.com/WordsOfInspiration and several blogs.



    New Day Counseling is a family couples counseling center that provides professional counseling services for the entire family. We help parents, children, teens, families, individuals and couples. We offer relationship counseling, couples counseling / marriage therapy, child therapy, adolescent counseling, anxiety counseling, depression counseling, divorce counseling, grief counseling, porn addiction counseling, substance abuse counseling. We also offer groups for anger counseling. Go to NewDayCounseling.org today for more information or call us at 248-649-8050. We are here to help, and we look forward to hearing from you.



    Love and Logic Parenting Classes help you with the most important job there is! You can learn practical tools & techniques for effective discipline, better communication, appropriate boundaries, healthy decision-making, & respectful adult-child relationships. Workshops are available at New Day Counseling in Troy. For more information or to register online go to: Love and Logic Parenting Class or call 248-649-8050.


    Put an end to anger problems & regain control over your life today. Anger management classes help for personal, court, and business. For more info go to newdaycounseling.org or call 248-649-8050 to register today. * Anger management class and/or individual anger counseling can be extremely supportive and helpful in equipping us with many tools for a better life.


    Are you experiencing addiction or substance use that is impacting your daily life? You are not alone! There are many people struggling with substance abuse and addiction! There are also many people who recover and live a drug free lifestyle. Come join our 6 week substance abuse group to discover the pathway to freedom! One Day at A Time! For substance abuse classes and/or individual substance abuse counseling, call or visit us today.


    Learn to handle & stabilize your emotions, lessen depression, and improve your relationships by learning coping skills, de-stressing techniques, and ways to change negative thought patterns with Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. Call 248-649-8050 to register for DBT Adult Anxiety & Depression Support Group today.


    Self-Esteem Group for Teen Girls (ages 13-17)
    Teen girls learn to feel empowered, gain self-awareness, develop positive coping, and improve daily problem-solving skills. Through G.I.R.L.S. (Girls in Real Life Situations) counseling curriculum, group discussion, and fun activities, girls will learn more about themselves and be better equipped to handle Real Life Situations. Call 248-649-8050 today to register. For more information, go to New Day Counseling Center. We also offer individual teenage counseling.



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