Showing posts with label positive thinking. Show all posts
Showing posts with label positive thinking. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

***7 Common Negative Labels & the Hidden Strengths They Reveal

We all have strengths and weakness.  Our strengths are usually referred to in positive terms such as "smart," "strong" or "talented."  Rarely do we view our weaknesses or deficits as potential clues to our strengths.  Some common and negatively perceived characteristics can actually help us discover some very positive qualities and underlying strengths. 


Following is a list of 7 common negative labels and some other ways we might look at them:



We all have strengths and weakness. Our strengths are usually referred to in positive terms such as "smart," "strong" or "talented." Rarely do we view our weaknesses or deficits as potential clues to our strengths. Some common and negatively perceived characteristics can actually help us discover some very positive qualities and underlying strengths.

Following is a list of 7 common negative labels and some other ways we might look at them:


1. Stubborn - People described as stubborn may also be described as being difficult, resistant, and unbendable. However, their underlying strengths may include some positive qualities such as: persistence, determination, and an unwillingness to give up.

2. Controlling - When people are said to be controlling, it usually suggests that they may be firm, manipulative and/or authoritative. On a positive note, they may also be assuring and/or resourceful.

3. Uncooperative - This label may suggest disunity. However, it may also suggest underlying strengths such as independence, a self-starter, inner-directed and motivated.

4. Perfectionist - Sometimes perfectionists are seen as being unrealistic, unhappy and dissatisfied with their best unless it is flawless, without any mistakes. On the positive side, perfectionists may be highly driven and motivated people. They may be persistent in problem-solving and/or highly dedicated.

5. Dependent - This label is sometimes associated with weakness. However, someone who is dependent may also be a social person, flexible and/or cooperative.

6. Nosey - These people like to know secrets and they do not like to miss out on any interesting news or happenings. Their underlying strengths may include a healthy curiousity for knowledge and insight. They might enjoy research and investigation. Their inquisitive nature may help them to ask the right questions and get the answers needed.

7. Sarcastic - This label may seem to be limited in uncovering any underlying strengths since it is often assoicated with being mean, insensitive, cunning and/or selfish. Yet, it is another negative label that can reveal some underlying strengths. Maybe people described as sarcastic may also be pretty clever and perceptive.



Although people have a tendency to use labels when describing others, it is more beneficial to be aware of individual characteristics and qualities. Labels can be very general and may imply different things to different people. They usually are associated with negative traits. However, considering the hidden strengths that can be implied helps us to reconsider the implications of negative labels. We can be more open to uncovering strengths and potentially positive qualities. We can focus on what is good and likeable about someone rather than what is bad and undesirable. It is simply another way to look at things and one in which we are encouraged to find the best in others.

When you look for the good in others, you discover the best in yourself. ~Martin Walsh


People judge by outward appearance, but God looks at the heart. ~1 Samuel 16:7


Look for the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. ~Philippians




7 Common Negative Labels & the Hidden Strengths They Reveal
Copyright © 2012 Krystal Kuehn BeHappy4Life.com NewDayCounseling.org All Rights Reserved



Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a licensed professional counselor, best-selling author, teacher, and musician. She specializes in helping people live their best life now, reach their full potential, overcome barriers, heal from their past, and develop a lifestyle of health, happiness, and love. Krystal is the cofounder of NewDayCounseling.org, a relationship counseling, family counseling center, specializing in helping individuals, couples and families with professional counseling services for relationship problems, parenting issues, depression, anxiety as well a s substance abuse classes, anger management groups, and more. Krystal is also cofounder of StopSuicideSong.com and BeHappy4Life.com as well as Facebook.com/WordsOfInspiration and several blogs.



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International Best Seller: The 10 Keys to Happy and Loving Relationships provides essential tools to help you understand relationships and how to make them more fulfilling, harmonious and successful. You will be taken on a personal journey to discover how you communicate the 10 key attributes of love as you relate to others. You will be empowered with tools to replace unhealthy patterns with new, healthy and effective ways to communicate, connect and love others. And you will discover how to communicate and experience genuine love and true happiness in ways that will change you, your relationships and your life forever!



Click here to see inside the book.


New Day Counseling is a family couples counseling center that provides professional counseling services for the entire family. We help parents, children, teens, families, individuals and couples. We offer couples therapy / marriage counseling, child therapy, adolescent counseling, anxiety counseling, depression counseling, divorce counseling, grief counseling, porn addiction counseling, substance abuse counseling. We also offer groups for anger counseling. Go to NewDayCounseling.org today for more information or call us at 248-649-8050. We are here to help, and we look forward to hearing from you.


Put an end to anger problems & regain control over your life today.
Anger management classes help for personal, court, and business. For more info go to newdaycounseling.org or call 248-649-8050 to register today. * Anger management classes and/or individual anger counseling can be extremely supportive and helpful in equipping us with many tools for a better life.

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Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Self-Talk: You Are What You Think

A man is what he thinks about all day long. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

What kind of thoughts come to your mind when you think about your life? How about your family, your work, your future? Suppose your thoughts could change your destiny. Would you want to change or improve any of them?

We might believe our thoughts just happen, and we don’t consider the fact that we can choose to stop certain thoughts and refocus. We can choose what we accept and meditate on, and we can choose what we resist and reject. Our thoughts shape the attitudes that direct our lives. We make decisions based on our attitudes and beliefs.

Thoughts lead to other related thoughts. When they are hopeful and positive, we develop a good attitude. Likewise, a bad attitude results when a habit of negative thoughts dominate our thinking. For example, suppose you feel hurt that your friend didn’t come to your birthday party. You might begin to think that it is because it isn't important to her. That thought may lead you to wonder if she really likes you. Maybe you did something to offend her. Maybe there is something wrong with you. You feel angry and rejected. You dwell on the offense and have a bad attitude. If you hold on to it, feelings of rejection may lead to bitterness toward your friend. It may even lead to a desire for retaliation. It is common to reject others when we feel rejected.

Hurt and angry feelings affect our choices and attitudes. We might not be able to control how we feel, but we can control how we direct our thoughts. Suppose you were to stop the negative cycle after feeling hurt by your friend. There could be many good reasons why she wasn't able to join you. Maybe it had nothing to do with you. You can choose to not take it personal if you know she wouldn't intentionally want to hurt you. You can choose to not dwell on the offense and negative feelings. You can refocus. If it really bothers you, talk to her about it. In doing so, you just may find out that you had the wrong idea all along. This happened to a woman I know. She never received the invitation sent by her friend. It was somehow lost in the mail. Her friend assumed she got the invitation and chose not to come. It was months until she discovered why her friend had a bad attitude and pulled away from her.

Our thinking patterns become habits and attitudes. Optimism and pessimism are the result of the kinds of thoughts we choose to dominate our thought life and perspective. If we were to live by these words of wisdom, we would spare ourselves of the negativity that keeps us from fulfilling our potential and purpose: Fill your mind and meditate on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse.*

We can choose to occupy our minds with the best in people or situations, rather than the worst. We can choose to see the beauty and splendor of every rose rather than its thorns and ugliness. We can notice and praise what is right and good rather than dwell on mistakes or problems. We can hold on to hope rather than submit to despair. We can appreciate and embrace what we have and all that is before us rather than live in regret of the past. We can choose to live today as best as we can because that is all we have right now.

Change your thoughts, and you change your world. ~Norman Vincent Peale

Every thought is a seed. If you plant crab apples don't count on harvesting golden delicious. ~unknown

Build this day on a foundation of pleasant thoughts. Never fret at any imperfections that you fear may impede your progress. Remind yourself, as often as necessary, that you are a creature of God and have the power to achieve any dream by lifting up your thoughts. You can fly when you decide that you can. Never consider yourself defeated again. Let the vision in your heart be in your life's blueprint. Smile!  ~Og Mandino


Nothing has any power over me other than that which I give it through my conscious thoughts. ~Anthony Robbins


Nurture your mind with great thoughts, for you will never go any higher than you think. ~ Benjamin Disraeli


Our life is what our thoughts make it. A man will find that as he alters his thoughts toward things and other people, things and other people will alter towards him. ~ James Allen

Watch your thoughts, for they become words.
Watch your words, for they become actions.
Watch your actions, for they become habits.
Watch your habits, for they become character.
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.
We are either the masters or the victims of our attitudes.


* Philippians 4:8


Copyright © 2008, 2010 NewDayCounseling.org  All Rights Reserved.


Watch your thoughts, for they become words.
Watch your words, for they become actions.
Watch your actions, for they become habits.
Watch your habits, for they become character.
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.
We are either the masters or the victims of our attitudes.
To learn more about developing healthy habits in your life and self-talk, check out:
21 Power Habits for a Winning Life (Volumes 1 & 2), click here



New Day Counseling is a family counseling center that provides professional counseling services for the entire family. We help parents, children, teens, families, individuals and couples. We offer couples therapy / marriage counseling, child therapyadolescent counseling, anxiety counseling, depression counseling, divorce counseling, grief counseling, porn addiction counseling. We also offer groups for anger counseling. Go to NewDayCounseling.org today for more information or call us at 248-649-8050. We are here to help, and we look forward to hearing from you.


Put an end to anger problems & regain control over your life today. Anger management classes help for personal, court, and business. For more info go to newdaycounseling.org or call 248-649-8050 to register today. * Anger management classes and/or individual anger counseling can be extremely supportive and helpful in equipping us with many tools for a better life.



Love and Logic Parenting Classes help you with the most important job there is! You can learn practical tools & techniques for effective discipline, better communication, appropriate boundaries, healthy decision-making, & respectful adult-child relationships. Workshops are available at New Day Counseling in Troy. For more information or to register online go to: Love and Logic Parenting Class or call 248-649-8050.


Self-Esteem Group for Teen Girls (ages 13-17)
Teen girls learn to feel empowered, gain self-awareness, develop positive coping, and improve daily problem-solving skills. Through G.I.R.L.S. (Girls in Real Life Situations) counseling curriculum, group discussion, and fun activities, girls will learn more about themselves and be better equipped to handle Real Life Situations. Call 248-649-8050 today to register. For more information, click here



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